Do Women Take Sex Seriously? Are The Stereotypes True? Do Women Only Care About Sex As It Relates To Love?

Do Women Take Sex Seriously?

Are The Stereotypes True? Do Women Only Care About Sex As It Relates To Love?

It was a common belief that women used sex to gain love and men used love to gain sex, but are the genders really still stuck in this rut? Or

 have women become less emotionally attached when it comes to lovemaking... excuse me, I mean SEX?

In most metropolitan areas, it seems that women have placed less importance on love and relationships and more importance on sexual satisfaction; the instant O.

That's not to say that there aren't women who place a great deal of importance on sex, but I'm referring to the ones who simply use sex as a means of getting off, rather than a means of expressing love.

she used you for sex

When women go to nightclubs (or the like) and end up engaging in one-night stands, it's not because it just happened... it's because these women left the house prepared to go on the prowl. So whereas you might think that she couldn't resist your seductive ways, she had already planned what was going to happen that night; you just happened to be in the right place at the right time.

Jennifer*, a regular club girl and O.N.S. (One-Night Stander), made it very clear that on some nights, she goes out knowing that she wants to engage in crazy sex come the night's end, the only question is who'll be the lucky guy.

Although emotion might still be there, especially considering that sex interconnects two people — even if they're strangers — it's obvious that for many women, sex has moved beyond the "lovey-dovey" state of things and transformed into more of a physical fulfillment.

but she wants love

"Don't get me wrong, I would love to have a serious boyfriend to commit to and make love to," says Jennifer, "but in the meantime, I need instant gratification as well. What am I supposed to do? Wait for the right man to come along? It's virtually impossible to meet someone stable nowadays. We are the now generation after all: we want what we want, and we want it now."

There was a time when many women would date a man seriously before engaging in sexual intercourse, hell, there was even a time when women wouldn't engage in sex until wedding vows had taken place — but it seems like the women who still hold those values are slowly fading into the background.

Is this happening because women are adopting more of a male mentality regarding sex, or have women always had these instincts, and feel that it's okay to act upon these impulses now? Jennifer thinks that it has more to do with impulse: "We get lonely, we need instant gratification and it's nice to cuddle up to a warm body on occasion."

guys flaunt, women want

In general, guys don't disguise their sexual escapades and instead brag about their conquests in the bedroom. And it's no secret that women have the same sexual urges, and even though plenty of women like Jennifer exist, most women dare not publicly admit that they have these urges for fear of being labeled sluts.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with women thoroughly enjoying sex, but I am a firm believer that there is no better sex than sex that comes with strong emotion. We are all emotional beings and taking the emotion out of sex might be good for some, but ultimately, if you've experienced sex with love, then sex without it will likely never measure up.

But I am not here to lecture you, but rather help you in your sexual endeavors, and if you want to avoid being just a one-night stand and would prefer going on for about 69 days instead, then here's what you'll have to do to keep her coming back for more.

Avoid being a dildo with a pulse.

keep her coming back

Although some guys would enjoy nothing more than to be used and abused by a lonely woman for an evening of raw, meaningless sex, other guys don't mind the lack of emotion, but would like the sex to last longer than one night (a steady lover without the commitment).

If you want to avoid being a sub or better yet, if you want to ensure that she keeps coming back for more, then you need to wow her with your first sexual impression. Here's how:

Be a gentleman

Be courteous at all times, even after you've reached your climax for the evening. Treat her like a lady — mind your manners and walk her to the door — and if you're leaving her place, thank her for a wonderful evening.

Don't make the first move

If it's clear what's about to go down, don't jump on her like a starved hobo and start humping uncontrollably. Indulge in conversation and let her make the first move. If she wants your body and she thinks you're sexy, don't worry sugar; she'll let you know.

Blow her mind

When you do begin messing around, take your time before you penetrate (and you had better wear a condom). When you kiss her, do it softly and wetly. When you hold her body, use your hands to outline her body softly and slowly, but then grip tightly. When you finally penetrate, do it slowly, rhythmically and deeply. Pay attention to her entire body and keep her coming.

Take her number, give yours

Before you leave, ask for her number and furnish her with yours. The catch? Don't call her — this presents a challenge. If she doesn't call, then oh well, you had a wonderful one night together. But if you performed all of the aforementioned suggestions, then she'll be calling before long.

Keep it light

Once you're in, and sex has become a wonderful hobby for both of you, don't become emotionally hung up on her and even if you are, don't show it. Don't buy her gifts, don't compliment her too much and don't see each other too often. This is just sex after all, isn't it?

it's not all good

The downfall of this scenario is that one party will definitely begin experiencing emotional attachment toward the other. It is difficult to continuously have intimate contact with someone and not fall into emotional turmoil.

You might think that relationships are tricky, but sex is even trickier. And although women will be quick to demand their orgasms and swear that they believe in sex with no strings — sex always comes with some fulfillment, or lack thereof.

According to John L. Ferri, author of Sex in the Romance: A Review of Romantic Encounters of the Close Kind, "Sex without emotion is like ice-cream without chocolate syrup and crushed peanuts on it — not bad, but missing something vital." I don't think I could've put it better myself.

So before you decide to dive into a casual sex relationship, remember that you might end up in a situation where you take sex more seriously than the woman you're laying next to. Casual sex is an acquired skill, so be prepared because it seems that more and more women are beginning to acquire it

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