Are You Sexually Compatible With Her?

Are You Sexually Compatible With Her?

In the beginning of your relationship, you and your girlfriend were able to give rabbits a run for their money when it came to sex (what did you think I was going to say, carrot consumption?). But once the "honeymoon" phase came to a halt, it seems that both of your needs have changed — and they're conflicting, to say the least.

I tell everyone who'll listen that sex can make or break a relationship. Of course, sex should not be the most important factor in a relationship, but you and she must be compatible. Otherwise, one of you may be tempted to stray, or worse, you may start fighting over the little things due to frustration.

Think about it: In a relationship, you have to agree on what you foresee for the future and the kind of relationship you want to have. And while some partners think it's okay to date other people, others think that that's completely unacceptable.

And sex is no different. Some partners want to have sex every day while others might think that engaging in sex play once every two weeks is great. Sexual preferences in the bedroom may be completely different as well. Now do I have your attention?

but all guys beg

I've heard this saying so often that it has become a cliché: Guys have to beg when they want to get some from their women. That is not the way it has to be. Chances are that out of the billions of people roaming this Earth, there has to be a few who like the same things you do when it comes to sex. Whether or not they have anything else in common with you is a whole other article.

But the point is that if you're begging for sex on a weekly basis or if she refuses to go down on you because she thinks "that's disgusting," even as you crave fellatio the way a stranded man on a deserted island craves water, then perhaps you need a minute to reflect on what's up — or not up, as the case may be.

Oh and, believe it or not, there are plenty of women out there who are in relationships in which they're the ones who are begging for sex, and a variety of it. So it's not strictly a torturous thing that men go through.

in the beginning

Although most people admit that they had a lot more sex in the beginning of their affair, some women also revealed that they'll ease off so as not to give their men the impression that they're sex maniacs.

So after the first few times you make love, don't hastily decide that you and her are not compatible. Perhaps your woman just needs some time to open up and become adventurous.

Discussing sex at the beginning of your relationship can't hurt either. After all, if you wanted to have three children in the future and your woman didn't want any, wouldn't you think twice about marrying her? What if she thought sex was only something she would give you as a reward and yet you expected to have sex virtually every night?

Of course, there are many other levels on which you must agree, but trust and love are just as important as sex to many people. And if you and she never give sex a second thought, then that means that both of you likely agree that it isn't important to you. But nevertheless, you do agree.

is it a priority?

If you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with her, ask yourself the following questions to get a perspective on what your future might be like from a realistic stance.

Do you love her?

Do you trust her?

Do you enjoy her company?

Are you sexually satisfied?

It may not be so cut and dry, but if you've answered "yes" to all of the aforementioned questions, then chances are that a future is likely for you and her. But if there's a "no" lingering around in there somewhere, maybe you should think long and hard about what's important to you. It's not just about sex, but it is part of the general equation.

how often do you like it?

Obviously, if you want to have sex five times a week and she wants it once a day, a compromise can be reached. But if you want to make love four times a week and she only wants to do it once a month, eventually there's going to be a problem.

So just as you would discuss what you want when it comes to raising kids and where you're going to live, you should also bring up the issue of sex. Be reasonable about it and do your best to reach an understanding. And please, don't say anything like, "If I don't get sex at least twice a day, I might be forced to cheat." Nothing good will result from ultimatums.

how kinky are you?

Whether you like to wear diapers and be spanked before you make love, or enjoy a simple moment of missionary, the kind of sex you're into is as important as how often you want it.

Is she willing to be creative and try anything once, or will she throw you out of the room if you ask her to touch your G-spot? After all, everybody likes burgers, but how many people like them with no condiments? I think you get my drift.

get with the program

In this day and age, it seems that it's getting harder and harder for people to maintain a relationship. This might be due to the fact that people are afraid to talk about what's really on their minds.

It's not shameful to consider sex an important factor of your relationship. Sex releases endorphins, which is a good thing. And if you like sex and she doesn't, a problem will surely arise down the line.

So sit down with your woman, and if you want to get serious with her, then discuss all the issues and put sex on that list. If you're just having fun with her, then obviously she's already doing something right in the bedroom...

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